Never.

Pain;

The word is most constantly used in my head when I'm around people. 

There's a voice in my head every time someone says: 

"Fat girl probz." (That's you)

"I look horrible today." (That's you.)

"OMG your so pretty." (Guess what you can't be.) 

So on and so on the voice in my head makes me cry. The voices won't stop. 

They said if I tell anyone about them that they'll hurt me. I don't want them to get me. I want to be the stunning girl everyone looks like or the girl that has beauty but doesn't see it. 

But I'll never to be able to see or know what it feels like. I want to end myself but they tell me it's not time. They tell me not to but they still say things that hurt. 

They don't have to rub it in I know I'll never be model material. They hate that I'm not girly and hate that I wear to big t shirts baggy jeans and tennis shoes. They want me to be more like the other girls who put time into their morning to get better. But then again I will never be like them.